I was brooding on how I was feeling, after having returned from India feeling hungover. And amputation is what came to mind.
Part of me comes to life in a developing country that lies slumbering when living here. The sights and sounds, the dirt and poverty, the tastes, the air appeal to me and wake me up, make me come to life.
For others a trip to India may be a holiday. You go, enjoy, experience and come home and the holiday chapter is closed. For me it feels like a trip back home and makes me realize what I miss here, in Holland.
But how can you explain that to others? Because for them it's simple. I just went to India for my sisters wedding, what a lovely holiday! How can I explain that something else is stirred in me, that I come back feeling amputated?
I will get used to this feeling and 'forget' how it is to be there and how I come alive. So this feeling of being amputated will thankfully (maybe sorrowfully) subside and life will go back to 'normal'.